Transformers
2007
Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel, Rachael Taylor, Jon Voight, John Turturro, Peter Cullen, Bernie Mac
Director: Michael Bay
Runtime: 144 Minutes
Distributor: Paramount
Rating: PG-13
Many a suit scoffed and sniggered when this idea was originally banded around Tinseltown, and rightly so. After all, despite whatever logistical problems might be involved in bringing a concept as high as this one to fruition, and there are many, there was a bigger problem. Where could they possibly find someone who can handle such epic battles between giant robots, huge explosions and hi-octane carnage, and at the same time offer due diligence to the wonder and attention span of a twelve-year-old boy to effectively capture the correct sensibilities. Well, step forward Michael Bay.
This live action adaptation of the classic cartoon series that began in the 80’s and is still going strong today finds young Sam Witwiky (LaBeouf) all revved up about his first car. It is an old beat up Camero, which just happens to be a sophisticated Alien-Robot hybrid, from another galaxy, known as Bumblebee the Autobot. On a mission to locate Sam, Bumblebee and the rest of the Autobots must act quickly to discover the location of a powerful artifact that crashed to Earth long ago before being discovered by one of Sam’s ancestors. Hoping to find it first are the Deceptions, sworn enemies of the Autobots, who seek not only the artifact, but their missing leader, the malevolent Megatron.
Michael Bay was simply born to make this movie. Placed on this green Earth by the Almighty for the sole purpose of delivering us a two and a half hour tour de force of explosive mayhem and destruction courtesy of gigantic robots beating the crap out of one another. This film needs and craves every little thing that makes Bay an otherwise terrible director; the corny dialog, the homo erotic undertones, the ear splitting explosions, the fleets of helicopters that just appear for no discernible reason. Bay lets loose the inner child with a $150 million firework show and boy is it something to behold. Finally the master showman can for once legitimately throw all the laws of physics and good sense right out of the window and concentrate on nothing but pure spectacle.
From the opening moments Bay knows exactly how best to deliver this material – wasting no time. Some marines are enjoying a little downtime on base in Qatar when over the dunes comes a looming shadow. A silhouette in the sand evolves to reveal a lone gunship. Fighters are scrambled and the chopper is ordered to land and the crew to disembark. As Bay moves in on the pilots face and as it flickers against the darkness of the cockpit, you can feel the tiny hairs on the back of your neck stand to attention and an exhilarating tingle of anticipation run down your spine. Then it all just goes ballistic as tanks and jets are overturned and hurled skywards like a grumpy toddler stamping about in a sandpit.
The next two and half hours zip by in a non stop visceral action fest that is punctuated by some terrific comedic moments, courtesy of a sharp and well written script and a real breakout performance by LaBouef that shows why he is one of Hollywood’s hottest new stars. Bay, as you might expect, never takes the foot off the gas for an instant and ably delivers plenty for anyone looking for some serious summer eye candy. The lengthy running time feels like half of what it actually is. The CGI work is seamless, the robots look spectacular, and the transformation sequences themselves are so much fun it’s worth buying the DVD just to scan back and forth to watch them happen one frame at a time. Of course the story is as thin as a piece of toilet paper, but who the hell cares? It’s giant robots fighting!
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